MAY 2005 NOMINATIONS

Anagrammy Awards > Nomination Archives > 2005


THE GENERAL CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The legal profession =
One gets help of liars.

2nd - Matthew O'Dempsey with:
Treadmill =
I melt lard.

3rd - Adrian Hickford with:
Thai food =
A hot Fido.

David Bourke with:
Two-timing one's partner? =
Inner temptation grows.

David Bourke with:
Prolapsed disc =
A sod's crippled.

David Bourke with:
House-trained cats =
Cute as, dear... no shit!

Tony Crafter with:
Make a date =
Take a dame.

Tony Crafter with:
Planning Committees =
Malign incompetents.

Tony Crafter with:
Immortality ~
may limit rot.

Tony Crafter with:
A romantic scene =
Nicest on camera.

Tony Crafter with:
Fantastic evening! =
Fascinating event!

Ellie Dent with:
To be guilt-ridden =
Did get in trouble.

Ellie Dent with:
The motivational speakers =
Means to hear positive talk.

Ellie Dent with:
Getting out of debt =
Got it: budget, often!

Ellie Dent with:
The divorced =
Over - ditched.

Ellie Dent with:
A Latin speaker =
Like, an era past?

Toby Gottfried with:
A low-calorie diet =
I do allow rice tea.

Paul Lusch with:
Contemplation =
Men plot action.

Dean Mayer with:
Mouth =
To hum.

Dean Mayer with:
The art of gentle persuasion =
Feel no pressure to gain that.

Dean Mayer with:
Unidentified flying objects =
If lost, did I eject funny being?

Dean Mayer with:
The royal princes ~
in Charles' poetry?

Matthew O'Dempsey with:
Someone you can trust =
Say "Count on me"... So true!

Rosie Perera with:
Ticket scalper ~
talks price, etc.

Rosie Perera with:
Countryside =
Our city's end.

Rosie Perera with:
No rude posts =
Porn's ousted.

Rosie Perera with:
Sudden death =
Ended as "thud".

Rosie Perera with:
I loathe raw squid tentacles. =
Oh well, it's an acquired taste.

Rosie Perera with:
Animal vivisection ~
as in: on a live victim.

Rosie Perera with:
Don't cast your pearls before swine ~
lest any be trod upon, if sows career.

rp with:
Adult male =
A dull mate.

Rick Rothstein with:
Psychiatric hospital =
Trail is psychopathic.

Rick Rothstein with:
Ancient artifacts =
Nice art. Fantastic!

Rick Rothstein with:
Contemplates ~
comet, planets.

Rick Rothstein with:
Melodramatic =
Me? A mild actor?!?

Christopher Sturdy with:
Cry, as ~
scary.

Christopher Sturdy with:
A horde! ~
Oh dear!

View with:
Generalissimo =
Legions, armies.


THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

1st - David A. Green with:
The terracotta soldiers of Emperor Shi Huang Ti =
Here march the rigid statues of Oriental troops.

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Beatles' Yellow Submarine =
Album's entirely below sea!

3rd - Larry Brash with:
Soccer player Diego Armando Maradona =
Sadly, I am on rare Grade-A Moroccan dope.

David Bourke with:
The singer Bob Marley =
"Gorblimey! Neat herbs!"

David Bourke with:
Marc Bolan's Greatest Hits =
Car? Lost it. Bang! (Tree smash.)

Tony Crafter with:
'A Lotus Grows In The Mud' =
Goldie Hawn's smut tour.

Tony Crafter with:
The Cannes Film Festival =
Flash event lifts cinema.

Ellie Dent with:
"Sunflowers" painted by Vincent van Gogh =
Superb, even now, having gold, fancy tints.

Ellie Dent with:
Vera Lynn's "We'll Meet Again" =
Saw gentlemen in a VE rally.

Ellie Dent with:
The new Star Wars movie =
Saw no merits whatever?!!

Ellie Dent with:
The magnificent ceiling of the Sistine Chapel =
This IS nice: the Michelangelo painting effect!

Scott Gardner with:
Sir Lancelot and Guinevere =
In a censured love triangle.

Toby Gottfried with:
"The Raven", a poem by Edgar Allan Poe =
A death, palpable agony, "Nevermore."

Dean Mayer with:
The Champions League Final =
Uh-oh - LFC in a penalties game.

Dean Mayer with:
"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one" =
Yeah, maybe Lennon's made your immaturity too.

Paul Pan with:
Casper the friendly ghost
Deathly corpse frightens.

Rosie Perera with:
Follow the yellow brick road =
Few will recall Dorothy book.

Don Rogers with:
Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith =
Preview of the series: Egoist Ani *IS* Darth!

Rick Rothstein with:
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes =
Actors smile, hide 'n' make-out.

Christopher Sturdy with:
Morecambe and Wise =
We're mad, manic OBE's.

View with:
The great singer Bob Marley =
Mainly best reggae, brother!

zolrakk with:
Desperate Housewives =
As we the "pious" deserve!!


THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Saddam pictures in 'The Sun' =
Captured this man's undies.

2nd - Rick Rothstein with:
One path to unite countries... ~
the European Constitution.

3rd - Christopher Sturdy with:
A rhetorical question =
Can the Iraqis rule too?

David Bourke with:
The European Constitution =
Thence to Paris: "Et tu... oui?" - "Non!"

David Bourke with:
Renault Formula One racing driver Fernando Alonso =
One daring forerunner, I do McLaren no favours at all!

Tony Crafter with:
Scientists clone Britain's first human embryo =
Scorners insist minute baby-form isn't ethical.

Ellie Dent with:
Saddam Hussein =
"Sun" said shamed.

Toby Gottfried with:
Manchester United =
Rich nut needs team.

Paul Lusch with:
Nuclear proliferation =
Continual peril or fear.

Dean Mayer with:
Kylie Minogue has got breast cancer =
Aye, make bigshot singer cancel tour.

Don Rogers with:
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes ~
made emotional shrieks. CUT!

Christopher Sturdy with:
US robot builds copies of itself =
Possible futuristic blood foes.


THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The indicted singer Michael Jackson =
"Get in, scared child! Join me in the sack!"

2nd - Tony Crafter with:
The Russian Empress =
She sees Mr Rasputin.

3rd - Toby Gottfried with:
Peter Ilyich Tchaikovsky's ~
this tickle-ivory-keys chap.

David Bourke with:
Kate Silverton =
Violent streak.

Larry Brash with:
Michelangelo Buonarroti =
Imagine color... then labour.

Ellie Dent with:
G. 'Dubya' and Tony Blair =
Bad at ruling *anybody*?

Ellie Dent with:
The artist van Gogh =
Go get that varnish!

Joe Fathallah with:
William Henry Gates ~
with many large lies.

Dean Mayer with:
French anatomist Paul Broca =
Brain central to famous chap.

Rosie Perera with:
Thomas Stearns Eliot =
Oh, so it's a letters man!


THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The Parisian street =
A painter sits there.

2nd - Tony Crafter with:
Noble King Arthur's famed Camelot =
Knights came for Round Table meal!

3rd - Toby Gottfried with:
McDonalds Corporation =
Add onions, color, crapTM.

David Bourke with:
Proportional Representation =
Proletariat per-person notion.

David Bourke with:
Capon the Butcher =
Retch-up the bacon!

Ellie Dent with:
Apple's iPod =
Sad pop pile?

Joe Fathallah with:
McDonalds Restaurant =
Menu: Rats and cold rats.

David A. Green with:
The English Place Names Society =
As in Epsom, Chelsea, Thingley, etc.

ofap with:
The University of Warwick =
Where work activity is fun.

Rosie Perera with:
Yellow-bellied Sapsucker =
A bird pecks well, you'll see.

Rosie Perera with:
The World Health Organisation =
Oh, rather I had got nations well.

Rick Rothstein with:
The European Constitution =
Utopian cure? It's not the one!

View with:
The Costa Brava region of Spain =
Anchoring of private sea-boats.

View with:
Montessori
Moron sites.


THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY

1st - Tony Crafter with:
People who take an instant dislike to politicians are merely saving time. =
Please note it, as we also don't like a vain, lying, pathetic Prime Minister. OK?

2nd - Ellie Dent with:
"The natural superiority of women is a biological fact" Ashley Montagu =
Oh face it, guys! We claim an honor, as it IS a battle outperforming you all!

3rd - Christopher Sturdy with:
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, directed by Mike Newell =
Film written for children (or debated by the real geeko type).

David Bourke with:
The hit record 'You'll Never Walk Alone' (Gerry and The Pacemakers) =
"Really a cheer to Steven Gerrard in Turkey? Eh! Eh! Calm down... ok, pal?"

Larry Brash with:
Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
=
Sorry, don't bother her for a few dollars nor beg her for an I.O.U., as it offends or else will then end in a long bad debt burden.


THE LONG CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Little Bo-Peep has lost her sheep

 

2nd - Tony Crafter with:
One day I was playing - I was about eight years old - and I noticed the cellar door was open just a crack. Now, my parents had told me, "Never go near that door, lad," but damn, I had to find out what was on the other side if it killed me! So I went to the cellar door and then I pushed it open and edged through and... I saw strange, wonderful things - things I had never seen before... trees, grass, flowers, the sun - that was nice!

=

A man was driving east to Ottawa on a steep mountain pass when he almost collided with a car, wildly careening around the bend. "Sheeet! You reckless, stupid fool!" he shouted. The other driver, a woman, wound down her window and yelled, "Pig!" Angry at the insult, the obsessed fellow jerked his car into gear, roared off fast round the steep bend... and crashed it straight into a giant hog standing in the road!

 

3rd - David Bourke with:
George Galloway:
"All your lies have come back to haunt you.
The best thing the Labour party could do is
sack you tomorrow morning... New Labour
plumbed new depths in this campaign."
=
Bethnal Green and Bow Muslim Holy War:
With much courage, a cheeky Respect Party
loudmouth beats unpopular old cow Oona King,
gives a bloody nose to Tony "Liar" Blair,
the smug git.

 

Christopher Sturdy with:
Off to Italy for a week tomorrow. See you all anon. (Will someone please get a LONG Nom, I'm getting lonely there on my own!!)

Tony Crafter

=

Yo, To

Woo fate.

One anagram's coming.
You knew we'll willingly rearrange letters for a little fee (nom, money...)
To flee monotony too.

HSP

 


THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

1st - Mike Keith with:
Stars of the Seasons

 

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Christina Rossetti: A Birthday

 

3rd - David Bourke with:
'Don't Let's Be Beastly To The Germans' - Noël Coward [version I]

 

Tony Crafter with:
Libster Lobster Labster Lee

 

Dan Fortier with:
The first few paragraphs of Moby Dick

 

Rosie Perera with:
Flintstones... Meet the Flintstones

 

James H. Young with:
Top opera (A redivider poem)

 


THE RUDE CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The nude resorts =
There to undress!

2nd - Rick Rothstein with:
The Miss Universe Contest, ~
it's never seen so much tits!

3rd - David Bourke with:
The former child actor Macaulay Carson Culkin =
Outcry, alarm, and rancour... Michael felt his cock!

Tony Crafter with:
Sheer passion =
A horse's penis.

Tony Crafter with:
A ski resort =
Risk to arse.

Tony Crafter with:
An experienced tart =
Expect dear Trannie.

Tony Crafter with:
It's no laughing matter =
Stimulating the organ.

Tony Crafter with:
Gilbert Keith Chesterton =
The right testicle broken!

Tony Crafter with:
A woman's menstrual cycle =
Consummate screw anally?

Dean Mayer with:
Young ladies =
Laid one, guys?

Dean Mayer with:
Great big arse =
Baggiest rear.

Paul Pan with:
Herpes lesion ~
on her lips, see?

Zoran Radisavlevic with:
The male prostitute =
Pet to stimulate her.

Rick Rothstein with:
Menstruation =
Item's a turn-on.

Christopher Sturdy with:
Women who say no =
No woo saw hymen.


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