Anagrammy Placings by David Bourke in 2000
All the highly-placed anagrams by David Bourke from the 2000 Anagrammy Awards.
LONG CATEGORY, January 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
Bohemian Rhapsody
PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY, January 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
The Reverend Ian Paisley =
He is a "Never Ireland!" type.
SPECIAL CATEGORY, January 2000:
eq.2nd - David Bourke with:
[A group of George Michael themed anagrams.]
"No Y-fronts? Let's shag rectum!"
= Songs From The Last Century
A hairy gay Greek go-go musician. (Police sore too!)
= Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou (George Michael)
Up in Rio, to goose a gay
= Georgios Panayiotou
Gay ring glee: 'Wham!' idol career ended
= George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley
I'm Harrow sex-menace... giggle, eh?
= Ex-'Wham!' singer George Michael
G.M. led cop in, let penetrate asshole!
= The Los Angeles Police Department
Who, me? I'll stalk, rim, roger, rape!
Or: "I'll arrest limp 'Wham!' greeko!"
= The Will Rogers Memorial Park
A cop lubricant
= Club Tropicana
A Public W.C. marathon
= 'Club Tropicana' - Wham!
Wowee! A gay Greek homo bum-pouf
= 'Wake Me Up Before You Go Go' - Wham!
I help screw arses
= Careless Whisper
God! I want that fairy!
= Waiting For That Day
Gay News thrives, then?
= Everything She Wants
Get fairy in romp
Merry? Not if a pig!
Er, fit in gay romp
= Praying For Time
Fag fruit here
= Father Figure
SOS! Lewd gay can nob!
= Cowboys And Angels
Anal-sediment legend
= Ladies And Gentlemen
LONG CATEGORY, February 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
Stairway To Heaven
PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY, February 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
Leonardo DiCaprio =
Ocean idol, or a drip?
TOPICAL CATEGORY, March 2000:
3rd - David Bourke with:
His Holiness Pope John Paul =
Hope in Polish plan, oh Jesus?
LONG CATEGORY, March 2000:
3rd - David Bourke with:
Won't
Get Fooled Again
PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY, March 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
Madonna Louise Ciccone =
One cool dance musician.
RUDE CATEGORY, May 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
Clitoral stimulation =
"It is all to oil a cunt, Mr!"
SPECIAL CATEGORY, May 2000:
eq.3rd - David Bourke with:
HOW MANY RICHARD GRANTHAMS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
NONE. (BUT LIT THE AWARDS CHART! HAIL THE BIG SHOCK ANAGRAMMY
GOD!)
HOW MANY JON GEARHARTS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
DO JUST GET ONE RHYME KING (WHO CAN BOAST/BRAG A LITTLE - HA HA!)
HOW MANY LARRY BRASH'S DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
"G'DAY ALL! IT'S ONE!" - MR. L.B. (BY THE BUSH - WATCH
THE KANGAROOS AIR).
HOW MANY WILLIAM TUNSTALL-PEDOES DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT
BULB? =
BE ALIGHT? AH WELL, AT MOST, IT WILL TAKE ONLY ONE SUCH MAD, BAD,
TOP GENIUS.
HOW MANY JANETS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? =
AH, JUST BE TWO - BOTH LADIES CAN LET GO, MAKE ANY NIGHT!
HOW MANY MIKE KEITHS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? =
"I BET ON HIGH, BUT DO I KNOW MATHEMATICALLY?" ASKS
THE GEEK.
HOW MANY WHITNEY COHENS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
"CHANGE, EH? WHY, GLAD TO (THAT'S THIS ONCE), BUT I'M ONLY
A NEWBIE, OK!"
HOW MANY MICK TULLY'S DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
ONE, MAYBE? (A DUMB HUNCH) - GO ASK THAT LOWLY SICK LITTLE GIT.
HOW MANY DANIEL F. ETTERS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
BUT WHY? IN FACT, HE DOES NOT NEED TO A BIT. (EG: ALL A MAKER'S
LIGHT)
HOW MANY MEYRAN KRAUS'S DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
ASK D.B. - "ONLY ONE ISRAELI (BUT OY, WHAT A GEM! MUCH GREAT
THANKS!)"
HOW MANY RICHARD BRODIES DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
=
WHY, ABOUT ONE. O HARK! BIBLE SAID "CHRIST, MAN! GOD CREATED
LIGHT!"
PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY, July 2000:
eq.3rd - David Bourke with:
Pete Townshend, Roger Daltrey, John Entwistle and Keith Moon =
Note: The Who... nosy wonder, little gent, Spiderman, and The Joker.
OTHER NAMES CATEGORY, July 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
Want cleaner bowels? =
Newcastle Brown Ale.
ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY, July 2000:
eq.2nd - David Bourke with:
The State of Israel =
Settle of this area.
Felt haste to arise.
Fate: It loses earth.
Tolerate safe hits?
Soft, eh? Retaliates!
State Hitler as foe.
LONG SPAM CATEGORY, August 2000:
3rd - David Bourke with:
AMAZING PENIS ENLARGEMENT BREAKTHROUGH!
Finally, an all-natural way to lengthen and strengthen your cock.
Penis Pros has created the ultimate penis enlargement program. Rare herbs cultivated high in the Andes of Peru provides sexual power that has been untapped until we brought them to the masses worldwide. We guarantee these pills will make you the stud you deserve to be.
ALL NATURAL PENIS ENLARGEMENT - 100% SAFE!
http://www.herbalo.com
=
AMAZING PENIS ENLARGEMENT BREATHROUGH?
Men! Do women laugh at your stupid, naff, pale little two-inch (at best) tadger? Ha ha ha! Tough cheese, then, you sad tosser! But you'll never have sex without a proper pork-sword, so best get used to it, you pathetic stump-ended prick! And get a life, eh! See, all the Alt.Anagrams men have real hard, thrusting purple helmets! Ner ner ner ner ner!
ALL NATURAL PENIS ENLARGEMENT? - PANTS! BE 100% BALLS!
www.weewilliewinky.com
OTHER NAMES CATEGORY, August 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
Stella Artois - Reassuringly expensive =
A very strong ale, I see. All six pints? Sure!
GENERAL CATEGORY, September 2000:
3rd - David Bourke with:
The morning-after pill =
"Pregnant? Hell! I'm for it!"
ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, September 2000:
3rd - David Bourke with:
Dolly Rebecca Parton =
Bra coped? Clearly not!
TOPICAL CATEGORY, September 2000:
eq.2nd - David Bourke with:
Al and Tipper Gore... ~
preparing to lead!
RUDE CATEGORY, September 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
The menstrual cycle =
"My cunt creates hell!"
OTHER NAMES CATEGORY, September 2000:
eq.2nd - David Bourke with:
The Organization of Petroleum-Exporting Countries =
Gang met to fix up our oil price on (or set near to) zenith.
SPECIAL CATEGORY, September 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
The
Monty Python Dead Parrot Sketch
RUDE CATEGORY, October 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
The performing of cunnilingus =
Chin/tongue in prone girl's muff.
SPAM CATEGORY, October 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
CHECK THIS OUT
Try this site out. I found some really great Items.
http://www.sincerelyyours.com
Thanks
Tiffany
=
Why e-post here, sucker? Fuck off, you cretin! In Alt.Anagrams,
we do not wish to try this scummy, shitty little site.
LONG SPAM CATEGORY, October 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
The Most Powerful Anti-Obesity Drug Ever Discovered!
"It Is Like Metabolic Liposuction Vacuuming Off Excess
Body Fat!"
"It Is The Age Reversal Miracle Of The 21st Century!"
"It Is The Ultimate Anti-Aging Therapy!"
"It Is Cosmetic Plastic Surgery In A Bottle!"
These are statements from physician researchers - as they try to find appropriate words to describe some of the amazing health benefits they have noted and documented in their clinical research work with this incredible substance!
For More Information, Click Here http://21649973/hgh.html
To be removed from this mailing list, click here
http://21649973/cleanlist.html
Thank You!!
=
Hey, lard arses! Massive 36-72-36? All blubber? Trim it!
In fact, you mightn't be harpooned every time you go swimming!
- Stop talking-scales screaming:
"Christ! No more coach-parties, please!"
- See your genitals without the aid of a mirror!
- Find where you had left that missing TV remote-control!
- Stop calling 999 (the Fire-Brigade) over, to hoist you from the bath!
- Have fewer chins than the Chinese telephone directory!
- Ride a bike and don't stick in the saddle!
- Have sex for the first time since 1972!
- Smaller (44D) tits!
- Fit in an F1 car!
..etc, etc, etc.
Is it pretty much time to trim-up?
- I think it is! Cut the crap!
Nice size 12? Click here:
http://Absolutely-flabless.com
ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, November 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
The Traveling Wilburys: Bob Dylan, George Harrison, Tom Petty, Jeff Lynne and Roy Orbison =
An angry Jew / the Beatle / blond boy / sorry prat in ELO / stiff guy... in short, very boring old men.
LONG SPAM CATEGORY, November 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
Hello All
I would like to know what service or business is missing from the internet.
Could it use a more helpful (paid) version of Ask Jeeves?
Could it use a forwarding service so that snail and email is only
given to one company?
Could the internet use a Better Business Bureau? (reporting good
and bad companies, sites across the internet)
Maybe you want an ISP that charges only $10.00 / month?
What would you like to see thats not already on the internet?
I want to know...what you think and I want to you to forward this posting to at least 5 people. I would like to receive a minimum of 1,000 emails on this topic by November 5, 2000 - Can you help me. (I want a total of 15,000 emails by Nov 30, 2000)
Email your replies to wrowe62@uswest.net
http://www.deja.com/profile.xp?author=wrowe62@uswest.net&ST
Please use a subject of: SURVEY
Thanks
Wayne Rowe
=
Hi, you poor old jerks, I'm Mark Waine...
I would like to insult your intelligence by pretending that I'm out conducting some sort of internet survey, when, in fact, all that I'm doing is getting (at no cost to myself) the e-mail addresses of as many gullible assholes as possible, which I can then sell-off to various unscrupulous internet companies so they can bombard you too with spam to advertise their pathetic rubbish, such as penis (or tit) enhancement, online loans, sexual aids, perverted teenie porno videos, or worse...I bet you know just the sort of unwanted pure drivel that I mean! So anyway, I want to make at least $1,000,000 (or even $2,000,000!) by Nov 6, 2002.
Reply to:
whatastupidlittlefool@www.spam121-365@wet_ewe&sheepwool5050.au
(Please use a subject of :
"Wow wow wow! I see! I'm a total and utter wanker too!")
Thank you everyone,
- Mark Waine
PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY, November 2000:
3rd - David Bourke with:
The President of The United States of America, George Walker Bush =
Takes power after foe, Mr. Clinton... but gee, he's sure a shitheaded git!
SPECIAL CATEGORY, November 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
The
Ten Commandments
GENERAL CATEGORY, December 2000:
eq.2nd - David Bourke with:
While the cat's away, the mice will play =
With what aim? Well, a cheese, typically!
TOPICAL CATEGORY, December 2000:
2nd - David Bourke with:
Al Gore concedes =
Race closed. Gone.
LONG SPAM CATEGORY, December 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
Romance Coupons.com - is the place for fresh ideas that put the
variety back into your relationship - announced new Christmas
& Kwanzaa Romance Coupons. Check them out at:
http://www.romancecoupons.com
=
No chance to score? NoMates.com is THE site for a noncy chap without a fuck. Cripes! Horror! Ain't that a shame? (Plus not very nice). Come on up, wanker, and unzip the old chap!
Cock up & masturbate!
www.NoMates.com
LONG CATEGORY, December 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
Now, I don't want you to think I expect acknowledgements for all
of my posts, but I've posted what I consider to be some strong
anagrams during this month and have received very few comments.
Take this last week for example. My newsreader shows I posted
28 anagrams (some of which I *really* like) since, and including,
December 16th (and not including this one, of course) and yet
there have only been 3 responses. Since I've experienced connection
troubles with my ISP during the earlier part of this month (mostly
email problems with several emails lost to the ether) and since
I've been using a new, for-pay newsgroup server this last month,
I'm wondering if all that I send is actually getting to the newsgroup.
If so, well then, I guess I'm just over-estimating the "brilliance"
of my work and so be it. But I'd hate to think I'm doing all this
typing and that not everyone is seeing them.
So, could a maybe 3 or 4 of you (no need for the whole group to respond), assuming that you can even see this message, please do an experiment for me? If you have Outlook Express as your newsreader, or if you know how to do this in whatever newsreader you have, please select Edit/Find from the menu bar and type in Rick Rothstein into the "From" box (alt.anagrams should already be in the "Look in" box), click the check mark box in the "Received after" box and select 12/1/00 for the date on the calendar that pops up. Finally, press the "Find Now" button. In the status bar at the bottom of the window, does it say "113 message(s) . . ."? If so, then all my messages are getting through and I'll have to work harder to perfect my anagrams. If not, then I need to contact ?someone? to report the problem. Either way, I'd like to know.
Thank you and a Happy Holiday to all,
Rick
=
Hey, now I don't want you to think I'd expect all my net purchases to land on the mat, but this month I have ordered online (indeed, paid for on my American Express card): 6 gerbils, 3 hamsters, 1 tube of KY Jelly, 3 gross of cardboard toilet-tubes, the Lifetime Membership of the Richard Gere Appreciation Society, a vacuum cleaner, a shoehorn, a donkey, a llama, 12 leather whips, some stirrups, 14 pairs of crotchless pants, 10 pairs of Latex examination gloves, 28m of electric flex, a tub of chocolate body paint, new sheets, some Swarfega industrial hand cleaner, 10-denier fishnet stockings, a sexy negligee, Y-Fronts (furry-lined inside), a kilt, new felt merkin, the complete set of Baywatch videos, some Viagra, 3 boxes of shiny wet-look lipstick, new teeth, eye shadow, some nail varnish, meths, a nipple-piercing kit, The Toe-Sucking Handbook, a 'King Dong' heavy-duty twin-ended monster vibrator, a pound of sliced liver, the Tina Turner 'Nutbush' wig (with dayglo-tinted extensions), some new white stilettoes, 'Men! Men! Men! - The Complete Nude Photographic Works Of Robert Mapplethorpe', the new Village People's Greatest Hit Songs boxed-set Anthology, then the new-out hot 'Divine Naked!' video, a bottle of amyl-nitrate, the 'Diana' colonic irrigation kit, a set of seven hypodermic needles, the new 'Dominant S-and-M Bondage For Gents (Beginners)' book, a toothbrush, some 'Minty Menthol' mouthwash, some semen-stain remover, (ditto, shite), and then a copy of the Anagram Genius Windows software. Now thus far, it seems, only the Anagram Genius has actually arrived. I would therefore advise that you only order goods on the Internet from known, trustworthy, reputable sources.
Thank you, you sweet little honeys! Love,
Rick.
Mwah!
SPECIAL CATEGORY, December 2000:
1st - David Bourke with:
'Twas
the night before Christmas
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