Anagrammy Placings by Allan Morley in 2002
All the highly-placed anagrams by Allan Morley from the 2002 Anagrammy Awards.
GENERAL CATEGORY, January 2002:
eq.3rd - Allan Morley with:
The democratic process =
Crap choice deters most.
TOPICAL CATEGORY, January 2002:
eq.3rd - Allan Morley with:
Tetrahydrocannabinol =
N.B. Harry contained a lot.
LONG CATEGORY, January 2002:
1st - Allan Morley with:
Death
of a Whale [version 1]
TOPICAL CATEGORY, April 2002:
2nd - Allan Morley with:
Lady Elizabeth Angela Marguerite Bowes-Lyon =
All eulogize sweet royal grandma in the Abbey.
SPECIAL CATEGORY, April 2002:
3rd - Allan Morley with:
[A Nostradamus quatrain supposedly predicting September 11.]
Cinq & quarante degrez ciel bruslera
Feu approcher de la grand cite neuue
Instant grand flamme esparse sautera
Quand on voudra des Normans faire preuue.
=
A tense, unseen quarrel of Asia shall come up:
Dual quarters are ruptured, razed in fire;
Abundant fear & deceased men prompt
A crusader avenging, conquering.
GENERAL CATEGORY, May 2002:
2nd - Allan Morley with:
Conspiracy theorist =
Psychotic, or nastier...
ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, May 2002:
eq.1st - Allan Morley with:
The Death Star =
See that, Darth?
TOPICAL CATEGORY, May 2002:
2nd - Allan Morley with:
Presidential election =
I declare it is not Le Pen.
SPAM CATEGORY, May 2002:
1st - Allan Morley with:
Are YOU PREPARED for a TERRORIST ATTACK?
Then you need the BioChem Survival Manual
What can you do?
Who can you turn to?
Do you know the measures to take to protect you and your family?
If you do not know, you are not alone!
The BioChem Survival Manual Has the answers that you will want and will need to protect, you and those you care about!
The Survival Manual contains information taken directly from the Military's Nuclear Biological Chemical Training Manual, THE Manual used to teach military personnel how to prepare, prevent, identify, protect against and survive an attack.
Developed by BioChem Survival Systems and containing information you can understand in non-military terminology.
Only $24.95 + S&H
Call 113-6780
=
COULD YOU SURVIVE A SPAM ATTACK?
Unwanted and uninvited electronic circulars are not only very wearisome, monotonous, often hideous, inane and highly annoying, but commonly overload and ruin your computer. Thus, you need the SPAM SURVIVAL MANUAL!
1. Take a note of each annoying violation.
2. Attempt to ask each ISP to kindly inactivate each weak-minded,
unmannerly irritant's account.
3. Note the total futility of the above.
4. Phone your attorney.
5. Sulk.
6. Wildly throw random articles across the room.
7. Cut up your computer's modem or cable.
8. Wantonly shatter your monitor with a hatchet, or a small cannon
if available.
9. Last, annihilate your hard drive by playing frisbee with it.
10. You are now totally SPAM FREE, guaranteed!
PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY, May 2002:
2nd - Allan Morley with:
George Bush and Vladimir Putin =
Brave, triumphing duo sign deal.
SPECIAL CATEGORY, May 2002:
3rd - Allan Morley with:
From the
Irish, by Ian Duhig
RUDE CATEGORY, June 2002:
1st - Allan Morley with:
A wet T-shirt contest =
We contrast the tits.
SPAM CATEGORY, June 2002:
3rd - Allan Morley with:
If your home is served by a septic system, you will be able to
receive invaluable information on how to eliminate pump outs,
maintain the system properly and cure problems such as backups,
wet spots, odor, etc.
You can do this by checking out our SPC program at:
http://www.septic-solution.com
In addition, you will have the opportunity to participate in a free trial to test the effectiveness of SPC.
Please check us out.
Thank you.
Sincerely,
SPC
P.S. Remember, you must click on this link to receive this helpful information!
http://www.septic-solution.com
=
Well... I suppose this email account is increasingly like a cesspit, so it's only appropriate that your little crock of brown poop popped up. Let me clarify, you boorish, petty, anal-retentive wretch: it's not worth writing to me. Honestly, I won't need your product - my home's sewer is impeccable. But I think I WILL have to invest in some sort of spam-pump before the account succumbs completely to this cheap, unsolicited, invasive feces. Thus, unless YOU can provide me with one, you can take this spam and stuff it up your buttocks... back to where it came from.
TOPICAL CATEGORY, July 2002:
1st - Allan Morley with:
There is no God but Allah =
The tough old Arabs' line.
SPAM CATEGORY, July 2002:
1st - Allan Morley with:
Sliding Blade PowerTooth™ Pruning Saw with Belt Clip
by FISKARS®
The Sliding Blade PowerTooth™ Saw by FISKARS® has a 6" Stainless Steel blade featuring a patented triple angle tooth design to plane away wood faster than ordinary designs. The Quick Release push button lock ensures safety from accidental closure during operation of the saw.
Made in Finland, assembled in the USA, this saw comes with a handy belt clip and a lifetime guarantee.
CLICK HERE to order your Sliding Blade PowerTooth™ Pruning Saw by FISKARS® Today!
=
At last, a spam with real worth and appeal! I could do with one of those things, thanks. Partially because my dern garden grows wild and free in the time I take deleting all the needless, crass and nonsensical spam I get forwarded so incessantly, but largely because right now I feel like snipping important (if meager) soft and fleshy appendages off your body. I don't need to draw you a diagram.
So CLICK HERE if you wanna be Bobbitted quick smart with this sleek, robust, serrated saw. Or perhaps blunt scissors.
It won't hurt a bit. It'll hurt a LOT.
ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, August 2002:
eq.3rd - Allan Morley with:
All the world's a stage =
God's law: all's theater.
TOPICAL CATEGORY, August 2002:
eq.3rd - Allan Morley with:
Death to America! =
I hate a democrat!
SPAM CATEGORY, August 2002:
2nd - Allan Morley with:
Just say "Hey Culligan Man!" for crystal-clear, refreshing water at home.
Drinking plenty of water can be so easy! Your local, reliable Culligan Man has two convenient drinking water options for your family. Both provide a continuous supply of delicious water right at your fingertips...for just pennies a glass. Enjoy a state-of-the-art reverse osmosis drinking water system installed right at your kitchen sink. Or have refreshing bottled water delivered and served as you like it from a cooler. Now that's H2Ohhh so easy!
Click Here
Right now your Culligan Man has both on sale with a special introductory rental offer... just $3 a month for the first three months!
Click Here
=
You are in luck, ignoble spammer! It occurs to me that I can provide you with a rather similar offer in return. You see, I've got a 'natural spring' of sorts here which would be most handy for 'recycling' all that sparkling crystal-clear water, and I want to return it fast for each thoughtless, inane, mannerless clown like you to drink, bathe in or wash clothes and things with.
So just say "Hey Cubicle Man!" and henceforth I'll fill 2-3 gallons-worth of glass jars every day, delivered here to your door! Or if you prefer, I can just take a leak in your coffee maker every morning! (That's right, as seen on TV.) Now that's *really* 'Piss Easy'!
(I'm not joking, rotten bitch - either piss off, or get pissed on.)
TOPICAL CATEGORY, September 2002:
3rd - Allan Morley with:
The Arab-Israeli conflict =
Sharon: I'll act a bit fierce.
RUDE CATEGORY, September 2002:
2nd - Allan Morley with:
The striptease =
He peers at tits!
GENERAL CATEGORY, November 2002:
2nd - Allan Morley with:
Practise what you preach =
Chap was a true hypocrite.
LONG CATEGORY, November 2002:
3rd - Allan Morley with:
Hickory dickory dock.
The mouse ran up the clock.
The clock struck one,
The mouse ran down.
Hickory dickory dock.
=
Kinky cockroach skulked up chronometer.
So why did kinky cockroach scuttle?
Theory: chronometer did cuckoo!
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