The Anagrammy Results - September, 2005


There were 57 voters again this month, despite the fact that our host server stopped working for 5 hours on the first day of voting. Thank you all for your patience with this and the general slowness of downloading on the website. We are considering alternatives at present.

There were only eight winners this month with three members each winning three awards, one winning two awards, and three winning one each.


GENERAL:

With the exception of the top three, I felt the standard here was down somewhat on the usual brilliance and competitiveness we are used to seeing here.

"Horrid" led by nine points after just six hours and kept a good lead to the end of the competition. Ellie slotted into second place early on and also kept that position to the end.

The real interest was for third place. Adrian was there by a small margin for the first 24 hours, only to have Mey shoot up the table, passing everyone and end up getting third place quite comfortably.


1

  Horrid Stretchy Pus

57  

A nasty derailment ~ meant train delays.

2

  Ellie

45  

Life's too short = Foolish to rest?

3

  Mey Kraus

39  

Signboard = Boring ads.

4

  Rosie Perera

30  

The plastic surgeons ~ cut noses, gather lips.

4

  Toby Gottfried

30  

Elementary school = Hey, come learn lots!

ENTERTAINMENT:

David opened a very strong lead of 21 points at the six hour mark. Usually, the early leaders tend to increase their lead as time passes. However, David's lead was whittled back by Ellie to just eight points by the end of the competition.

This was David's 9th win this year and his 73rd overall.


1

  David Bourke

61  

The American singer Sheryl Crow = Why Lance Armstrong is cheerier.

2

  Ellie

53  

"Shaken, not stirred" = The star's one drink.

3

  View

39  

'...and they lived happily ever after' = Delivered that very happy finale

4

  Larry Brash

33  

English film director, Alfred Hitchcock = The rich Lord of crime flicks can delight.

5

  Rosie Perera

24  

Megabucks Lottery = Lucky bettors' game.

TOPICAL:

This was a fantastically close event with the top six in contention for most of the competition.

At the six hour point, Scott led by one over Tony, with Jesse five points back, then Mey and Rick three points behind him. By twelve hours, Scott led Tony by two. At the end of Day One, Scott and Tony were tied in the lead with Rick two points back.

At the half way mark, Mey had come from well back to lead by three, with Scott, Rick, Tony and Jesse with four points of each other. By the end of Day Two, Tony was the new leader by just one point over Mey, who was one point ahead of Jesse and then Scott one point behind him.

The final day saw Tony pull ahead by five points for a closely fought win. Four points covered the next four places.

As it was so close, I have included the top five in this category in the table below.


1

  Tony Crafter

42  

Britain's 'New Labour' Government = Blair's vow? Reign on at Number Ten!

2

  Jesse Frankovich

37  

The New Orleans disaster = Water rose in these lands.

3

  Rick

35  

New Orleans ‡ No real news.

4

  Mey Kraus

34  

FEMA director Michael D. Brown resigns = Critics from New Orleans badgered him.

5

  Scott Gardner

33  

Undersecretary Michael Dewayne Brown = Watched my career ruined by New Orleans.

PEOPLES NAMES:

If Topical was close, then Peoples Names was the opposite.

Ellie opened with a 12 point lead after six hours and was never in doubt, slightly increasing her lead to 19 by the end of the competition.


1

  Ellie

73  

His Royal Highness, Charles, Prince of Wales = See which rich English Royal son flaps ears!

2

  Mey Kraus

54  

Mister Hyde = Yes, I'm the Dr.!

3

  View

39  

The Gambino family = Might be Mafia only.

OTHER NAMES:

This was a fairly close event this month.

Tony led out with a two point margin at 12 hours. Over the last two days of the competition, he lengthened this to a nice little nine point gap, with David and Toby tying for second place.


1

  Tony Crafter

45  

The Snowdon Mountain Railway Ride = I do mean a windy tour in North Wales.

2

  David Bourke

36  

The Federation of Bakers = I often eat fresh bread, OK!

2

  Toby Gottfried

36  

Charles de Gaulle International Airport = To reach Paris/Rouen/Lille: land, get a train.

MEDIUM LENGTH:

This was close early on in the competition, but Adrian broke free and went on to win by 12 points. I was happy to finish strongly picking up second.

This was Adrian's 4th win this year and his 57th on the All Time Table.


1

  Adrian Hickford

63  

"Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation" by Lynne Truss =
Bet proven author's style can train us to analyze & use the apostrophe, colons, etc.

2

  Larry Brash

51  

The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is unread. =
It's true! Wilde ended in a terrible, austere jail, based just on his main flair, a rather unnatural need for cute men.

3

  Tony Crafter

47  

Sir Arnold Bax said (sort of!): "One should try everything in life once, except incest and morris dancing; ~
unicycling; any sort of shellfish; Rotterdam; Dido concerts; Indian beer and xeroxing one's privates."

AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE:

This month's challenge was inspired by an excellent anagram of the American Pledge of Allegiance found on Wikipedia by one of our members, who was trying to identify the author. We were unable to find out who created it, but it made me decide that it would be worth using it for a challenge. It is certainly one of the longest texts that we have used for a long time.

The anonymous author's anagram was allowed to complete as it was the source of the idea, despite the fact that it had not been posted to the Forum.

[Edit] The author has now been identified as Cory Calhoun, the autrhor of the famous "To be or not to be" anagram, from the 1990's. The voters were obviously impressed as well, as it took an immediate lead of 15 points half way through Day One. It finished a massive 34 points clear of my effort, with Tony challenging well just four points behind me.

Here is the subject text:
"I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."


1

  Cory Calhoun

71  

I, George W. Bush, an evil Republican fascist, used God to inflict pain on the world, end life, facilitate death, create militant jihad rebels, and to let youths die for nothing.

2

  Larry Brash

37  

I'll always eat McDonalds, elect Bush, own fifteen guns (in total), join the N.R.A, protect Israel, hate Fidel, diet, be litigious if hit, avoid church and... I pretend to be God-fearing.

3

  Tony Crafter

33  

I, Tony Blair, pledge allegiance to the President, Bush, and attest that, if directed, I will: act under his influence, lie on his behalf, advocate jingoism, go to war for fun. Do it!

LONG:

If General was a little weaker this month, then Long was definitely much stronger than usual. Typically, there have been only four or five entries, but this month there were eight nominations here and seven on the final list.

The start was quite close with me leading by one point over Mey after six hours, and with Tony one point behind him. By the end of the first day, Mey was one point clear of Tony, with me dropping off the pace. Tony broke well clear at the halfway point and maintained a nine point lead down to the finish line.

A great month for Tony with three wins. This gives him twelve for this year and 17 all up, moving him up to 14th place on the All Time Table.


1

  Tony Crafter

64  

A man in a supermarket line sees that a ... = It was a bleak Monday morning and the ...

2

  Mey Kraus

55  

House of the Rising Sun (traditional ve... = New Orleans: A reply By God Let me...

3

  Larry Brash

44  

An elderly woman has been admitted to a... = A lady of mature years consults her f...

SPECIAL:

In an unusual twist, the three winners in General were the three winners here, albeit in a different order.

As might be predicted, Mey led the way with a small margin on the first day of voting, but always well challenged by "Horrid" never more than half a dozen points in arrears. Ellie moved into clear third place by Day Two. Mey ended up winning by six points, with another creditable performance by "Horrid" this month for second place. Ellie's excellent "Children's' Rights" anagram was a well-deserved third.

Two wins for Horrid Stretchy Pus gives him four wins this year and eight in his career. Ellie had another great month with three wins taking her total to nine.


1

  Mey Kraus

65  

Two anagrams of a sonnet by Wilde

2

  Horrid Stretchy Pus

59  

Blowin' in the wind by Bob Dylan

3

  Ellie

37  

The Children's Bill of Rights

4

  Tony Crafter

18  

Old Friends (Simon and Garfunkel)

5

  David Bourke

15  

There is a house in New Orleans

5

  Richard Brodie

15  

Yes! No!

RUDE:

Mey's late nomination here looked very much the favourite, but it was not all plain sailing.

Mey was six points clear after 24 hours with Rick and View challenging strongly. Mey finished well to open a nine point gap to beat a fast finishing Adrian.

Three wins for Mey this month gives him 34 awards this year and 221 altogether.


1

  Mey Kraus

48  

The act of masturbation = Ain't that a burst of come?

2

  Adrian Hickford

39  

See 'Hymen Reconstruction' = Thus, restore my innocence.

3

  View

35  

With no panties ~ I want hot penis.


AWARDMASTER'S AWARD FOR THE BEST ANAGRAM OF A NON-WINNING AUTHOR

One anagram really stood out as deserving a win in a category that was very closely contested. It was Scott's Topical anagram. While he finished in fifth place, he led for some of the time. There were two other contenders for this award in the Topical Category who ended up with more points than Scott, but Scott's anagram was considered superior because of its directness, perfect grammar and having not a hint of contrivance in the subject text.

Scott Gardner with:
Undersecretary Michael Dewayne Brown =
Watched my career ruined by New Orleans.

This was Scott's 4th award this year and his 17th ever, moving up to equal 14th with Tony, Zoran, and Jon Gearhart.


Congratulations to all the winners. Thank you all for voting.


The Anagrammy Awards