[an error occurred while processing this directive]
The other day I went up to our local Christian bookstore and saw a 'Honk If You Love Jesus' bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I'd just come from a really rousing choir performance, followed by the most memorable prayer meeting. So, I bought a sticker and put it on my bumper.
Mamma mia! Am I glad I did, what an uplifting experience followed next!
I was stopped at a red light at this busy intersection, momentarily lost in thought about the Lord and how great He is, and didn't see that the lights had changed.
It's a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if that man hadn't honked, I wouldn't have noticed. I found that lots of people love Jesus!
While I was sitting there, the man behind started honking like crazy, and then leant out of his window and screamed, 'For the love of God, woman, go! Jesus Christ, GO!'
What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!
Everyone started honking! I just leaned out my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people.
I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!
There must have been a man from Florida amongst them all because I heard him yell something about a sunny beach. I saw another man waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked my grandson (your cousin Norman) in the back seat what that meant. Norman said it was probably some Hawaiian good luck sign or something.
Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the sign right back!
Norman burst out laughing. Yes, even he was enjoying this religious experience!
A couple of the people were so caught up in the glory of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I went to, but that's when I saw the lights had changed. So I waved at all my brothers and sisters and, grinning, drove on across the intersection.
I noticed that I was the only car to get through the intersection before the lights changed again and felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we'd shared. So I slowed the car down, leaned out the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove off.
Praise our Lord for such wonderful folks!
Will write again soon,
IDIOTS? NO; MEN ARE JUST JOLLIER!
If Viv, Kathy and Vicki go out for lunch, they will call each other Viv, Kathy and Vicki.
If Dick, David and John go out, they will jokily refer to each other as, Earwigo, Coyotebreath and Testicle.
When the bill arrives, Dick, David and John will readily throw in twenty dollars each, even though it is only for thirty-three dollars eighty. None of them will have anything smaller and will avoid admitting they want change back.
When the girls receive their bill, out come the pocket calculators and it is divided exactly.
A man will pay two dollars for a one-dollar item that he needs.
A woman will pay one dollar for a two-dollar item that she does not need but it's on sale.
A man has six things in his bathroom: a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving gel, a good razor, soap, and a towel.
The number of things in the average woman's bathroom is about three hundred and thirty-eight. A guy would not be able to identify more than twenty of these.
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is adjudged to be the start of a new argument.
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he does not.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
A woman will get dressed up to go shopping, give the plants a watering, empty the trash, cook, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
A guy will get dressed up for weddings and funerals.
LOOKING GOOD OVERNIGHT
Men wake up looking just as good as when they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
Ah, the joy of children! A woman is dedicated to, and knows all about, her children. She knows about their dentist appointments, romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears, hopes, ideas and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
FAULTFINDING - THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There is no use in two people remembering the same thing!