The Special Category

Anagrammy Awards > Voting Page - Special Category

An optional explanation about the anagram in green, the subject is in black, the anagram is in red.

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A farmer stopped at the local garage to have his truck repaired.

They weren't able to do it while he waited, but he said he didn't live far so he'd happily walk home.

He went into the hardware store en route and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint.

He then called in at the feed store and got a couple of chickens and a goose.

However, he now had the problem of how to carry all these purchases home.

While he was pondering it, an old lady approached him. 'Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to Juniper Lane?' she enquired.

The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact my farm is very close to that lane. I'd walk you there but I'm struggling to carry this lot.'

The old lady suggested, 'Why not put the tin of paint in the bucket. Then carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?'

'That sounds just fine,' he agreed and proceeded to walk her home.

On the way, he said, 'Let's take a short cut down this alley. We'll get there in no time.'

The old lady regarded him warily then said, 'I'm a lonely widow with no husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get into the alley you won't pin me against the wall and have your evil way with me?'

The farmer said, 'Hell, ma'am! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How could I possibly pin you against the wall and do those things?'

The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens.'

While taking a quick stroll in the countryside one Friday morning, two Irishmen, Callaghan and O'Toole, came upon an abandoned well.

Curious to know how deep it might be, O'Toole picked up a couple of small stones, threw them down the well and waited for the splash as they hit the bottom. But he heard nothing.

So Callaghan picked up a rock and hurled that down the well too. They waited a while, but still they heard nothing.

They decided that they would need something much larger and heavier, and after a hasty search of the surrounding countryside, they came upon an old wooden railway sleeper.

Summoning up every ounce of their combined strength, they managed to haul the heavy railway sleeper back to the well and together they propped it up and threw it down the hole. As they stood back waiting for the splash of it hitting the bottom, a goat suddenly darted between them and leapt straight into the open well.

"Huh? Did you see what oi just feckin' saw?" O'Toole croaked hoarsely.

"Oh, Holy Mother, oi think oi feckin' did," whispered a stunned Callaghan.

Both men were still recovering from the shock of what they had seen when a farmer appeared.

"Hi, have either of you seen a goat?" he asked.

"Oh brother, we certainly have!" exclaimed Callaghan. "A goat just came up and it leapt straight down dat feckin' well, so it did!"

"Ah, well that certainly wouldn't have been my goat," chuckled the farmer, "'cause mine was tied to a railway sleeper."

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The Beatles

Oh, flew in from Miami Beach BOAC.
Didn't get to bed last night
On the way the paper bag was on my knee
Man I had a dreadful flight
I'm back in the USSR
You don't know how lucky you are boy
Back in the USSR

Been away so long I hardly knew the place
Gee it's good to be back home
Leave it till tomorrow to unpack my case
Honey disconnect the phone
I'm back in the USSR
You don't know how lucky you are boy
Back in the US...
Back in the US...
Back in the USSR

Well the Ukraine girls really knock me out
They leave the West behind
And Moscow girls make me sing and shout
That Georgia's always on my mind

(musical break)

Yeah I'm back in the USSR
You don't know how lucky you are boys
Back in the USSR

Well the Ukraine girls really knock me out
They leave the West behind
And Moscow girls make me sing and shout
That Georgia's always on my mind

Oh, show me round your snow-peaked mountains way down south
Take me to your daddy's farm
Let me hear your balalaika's ringing out
Come and keep your comrade warm
I'm back in the USSR
Hey you don't know how lucky you are boys
Back in the USSR

V. Putin

Yeah, Russia's where it's happening we hold the power
So why did you all break away?
I am wholly certain, yeah that come the hour
You'll be back with us one day
So bring back the USSR
We'll all grow much stronger by far, man!
I'm backing the USSR

You got your independence but what have you done?
You're like chickens with no heads
You pygmies don't know how a country should be run
Don't know how it should be led
Get backin' my USSR
You'll go much higher by far, da!
Backing my US...
Backin' my US...
Backin' the USSR

Well, weak Ukraine will be mine some day
Crimea, it has gone
Okay folk, denounce your Western ways
Get back to where you once belonged.

(vodka break)

Yeah, I'm talking USSR
I'm talkin' a coup d'etat, man
I'm backin' the USSR

Oh, one by one I'll take my countries back
T'was always my design
You'll know okay the moment I attack
And I shall make you my-my-mine!

Now, don't be reckless, don't resist for goodness sake
I can break you with one hand
Take a moment to consider what's at stake
Head home to the Motherland
Go back to the USSR
Home to the land of your ma-ma!
I'm backin' the USSR!

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by Ogden Nash

Praise the spells and bless the charms,
I found April in my arms.
April golden, April cloudy,
Gracious, cruel, tender, rowdy;
April soft in flowered languor,
April cold with sudden anger,
Ever changing, ever true --
I love April, I love you.


Servile husband, once so stupid.
Gods sent April, arranged by Cupid.
April loggerhead, April fool,
Concerning verses of a golden rule;
When April is mushy and silly,
April charges my warm willy.
A verdict I'll regret and rue --
I hate April, wouldn't you?

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[R.L. Stevenson's timely poem is anagrammed into a slightly bleaker poem, followed by a constraint:]

Spring Song
Robert Louis Stevenson

The air was full of sun and birds,
The fresh air sparkled clearly.
Remembrance wakened in my heart
And I knew I loved her dearly.

The fallows and the leafless trees
And all my spirit tingled.
My earliest thought of love, and Spring's
First puff of perfume mingled.

In my still heart the thoughts awoke,
Came lone by lone together -
Say, birds and Sun and Spring, is Love
A mere affair of weather?

Remembering My Lost Half

A while had passed, yet I recall
How this fool promptly fell for her -
But dared not fight the plunge at all,
For mindless links are merrier.
And no grief, nor a twist of fate,
May snuff the avid spark worth saving
And like some evil sun negate
An ocean of elated craving:
My lips burn as I feel that kiss
Where fresher buds grew all around;
I'd sense my lady there, in bliss,
On these serene and pretty grounds.

[The 12-line poem contains a hidden phrase via two 6-line word pyramids (a puzzle in which each consecutive line adds a letter to the previous line's letterbank). The highlighted squares in these specific pyramids serve 2 purposes. The first is to pinpoint the location of both pyramids' definitions within the poem [2nd square in the 1st pyramid line->2nd word in the poem's 1st line ('while') and so forth]:

[The highlighted squares 2nd purpose is revealed once the pyramids are solved: they spell out the hidden phrase SPRING SEASON.]

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May Day (by Sarah Teasdale)

A delicate fabric of bird song
Floats in the air,
The smell of wet wild earth
Is everywhere.

Red small leaves of the maple
Are clenched like a hand,
Like girls at their first communion
The pear trees stand.

Oh I must pass nothing by
Without loving it much,
The raindrop try with my lips,
The grass with my touch;

For how can I be sure
I shall see again
The world on the first of May
Shining after the rain?

May had Vibrant Flowers
(Auntie Histamine)

The first daffodils,
Paperwhite narcissus,
The cherry-red tulips,
The daylily, night gladiolus.

The chrysanthemum,
Flowering magnolia,
The pink carnations,
The hyacinth, wisteria.

The evening primrose,
The daisies, strawflower,
The honeysuckle, lilac,
The dogwood, cornflower.

Bridesmaids' baby's breath,
Mimosa, heather, violet,
The alfalfa, amaryllis,
The aster, forget-me-not.

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Absent Place-an April Day, Emily Dickinson

Absent Place-an April Day-
Daffodils a-blow
Homesick curiosity
To the Souls that snow-

Drift may block within it
Deeper than without-
Daffodil delight but
Him it duplicate-

Delicately bathed in paint,
All cold lookouts did wait.
Flowers bound up with duty shine
Fragrant, sappy, soft, sedate.

Outlined in birthday chiffon;
Dreamlike, whimsical.
Imitates a picky patch;
Lithe mobs botanical.