Anagrammy Winners by Meyran Kraus in 1999

All the winning anagrams by Meyran Kraus from the 1999 Anagrammy Awards.

SPECIAL CATEGORY, February 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The Libyan desert =
Let's be in dry heat!

The Sahara desert =
Ass rather heated...

The Nubian desert =
Burned in the east.

The Gobi desert =
Be hot? Gets dire!

The Great Australian desert =
Gets real arid. Sun? Heat-treat!

 

SPAM CATEGORY, April 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
"This is a one time mailing. You will not receive an e-mail from our company again. Thank you." =
"A tiny, illicit violation? Spamming me once? How generous of you! A real humanitarian..." Mey K.

 

LONG CATEGORY, April 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
WE DO NOT HAVE ANYTHING AVAILABLE FOR DSS, SATELITE OR DIGITAL CABLE SYSTEMS AND DO NOT EXPECT ANYTHING FOR THEM ANY TIME SOON.
=
I exhibit a most annoying, ineffective spam that mentally-challenged nerds sent. A logo? "To Rob!"... Very sad. WAY too sad. It has to end!

GENERAL CATEGORY, May 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Dangerous Narcotic =
Snort a drug - Cocaine.

 

SPAM CATEGORY, May 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
This "Hot", new, technology will also allow you to (realistically) make $2-5,000 in less than 30 days part-time! =
Hey, 'Netwit'! This totally cool anagram shall only cost you 500 dollars. Please mail it within 20-30 weeks.

 

OTHER NAMES CATEGORY, May 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The Palestine Liberation Organization =
Arabs' petition? Legalize their nation? No.

 

ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, June 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Sydney Pollack's Tootsie =
Testicles on lady? Spooky...

 

TOPICAL CATEGORY, June 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The British Royal Wedding at Saint George's Chapel, Windsor =
Two rising 'English Trash', Edward & Sophie, celebrating today.

 

SPAM CATEGORY, June 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
WHAT MAKES US SO SPECIAL?????

We process over $4 Billion in credit card transactions every year.
We have over 100,000 merchants online and growing.
We offer secured on-line real time transactions.
We offer 24 hour customer service 7 days a week in 17 different languages.
We offer complete training and installation through our technical support group.
We offer a life time warranty and unlimited upgrades.
We help make money for your company and your customers.

=

WHAT MAKES ME REALLY MAD?????

Fuckers who are in love with theirselves.
Spammers e-mailing feces.
Low-life wankers ruining our net.
Warts & acne covered nerds posting awful, used stuff to newsgroups.
Eerie Pyramid Scams.
"Our letter can change your life" crap.
A guarantee of "Double your money" or "$40 to $40,000".
Every annoying, coffee\acid\cocaine-user pervert starting a letter with "712 Pure Hardcore Porno Pics of 71 horny women..."

And a final one:

A moronic list I didn't want!

 

 

ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY, June 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
A Penthouse Centerfold =
No clothes? Nude, fare pet!
Pose half nude? Not erect!
Pose nude? Cheer- not flat!
See a cunt, fondle her top.

 

SPECIAL CATEGORY, June 1999:
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
The Little Boy and the Old Man

 

AWARDSMASTER'S CHOICE CATEGORY, July 1999:
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
America's Funniest Home Videos =
'Amateur Comedies On VHS' is fine!

 

LONG CATEGORY, August 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with: [The lines uttered by Samuel L. Jackson in 'Pulp Fiction' whenever he had to kill a guy]
Ezekiel Twenty-five, Seventeen:
The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.
=
From Tarantino's funny, violent (yet new-style) 'Pulp Fiction'. The intense, groundbreaking hit features over-dose, rape and seinfeldish dialogs, and presents a few well-known men as Travolta, Keitel, Roth, Walken and Stoltz. This biblical quote is spoken by the Bad Mother-fucker himself, Samuel L. He says it every time he has to off new men: "Here's the scene: When I guide the needy, the poor, the shy, you, lewd son of seventy whores, try to get in their way. The devil worshiper, indeed! Ohhhhhhh, I AM god... and you're heading down to hell."

 

SPAM CATEGORY, September 1999:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
No Working!!!!!
No Selling!
No Meetings!
No Dressing Up!
No Time Required!
No Telephone Calls!
No Running Around!
No Presentations!
No Face-To-Face Contact!
=
No Uncaring Internet Felons!!!!!
No "Quick-Cash, So Log On" Conning!
No "test ignore" Genre!
No Fraudulent Deception!
No Misrepresentation!
No Spam Allowed!

 

SPECIAL CATEGORY, October 1999:
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Sylvia Plath: Words

 

GENERAL CATEGORY, December 1999:
eq.1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Garbageman =
Bag manager.

 

ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, December 1999:
eq.1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Robert Schumann =
Brahms' Nocturne.

 

AWARDSMASTER'S CHOICE CATEGORY, December 1999:
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
* BARELY LEGAL TEEN SLUTS
* LIVE SEX WITH SOUND
* OVER SIX THOUSAND VIDEO FEEDS
* UNLIMITED FREE VIDEO SEX
* HARDCORE CELEBRITY PICS
* TENS OF 1000s OF FREE HARDCORE PICTURES
THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE WORLD'S BEST PORN SITE !!
YOU WANT IT ..... WE GOT IT .... ALL HERE - E V E R Y T H I N G !!
WE SURE HOPE YOU ARE CUMMING TO SEE US!
WE ARE WAITING FOR YOU RIGHT ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THIS CLICK!!
http://www.freeyellow.com/members6/deplace1/index.html

=

* VIOLATION OF INNOCENT GIRLS
* EXCRUCIATING SCREAMS
* DIRTY MOVIES
* LOVELESS INTERCOURSE
* UNREAL VIPs FUCK
* EXTREMELY CHEAP PHOTOS
To low-duty buttholes:
You should be ashamed of yourselves.
The world will be better if you didn't exist:
Where I read my messages without 161,000 lists...
Where Spam is beef...
Where children experience life, not torture...
Where twits get offed and go with god...
Where there is peace.

 

 

Table of 1999 Winners


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