Anagrammy Winners by Meyran Kraus in 2001
All the winning anagrams by Meyran Kraus from the 2001 Anagrammy Awards.
GENERAL CATEGORY, January 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Antidemocratic =
Dictator came in.
SPAM CATEGORY, January 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
So my friend, I have given you the ideas, information, materials
and opportunity to become financially independent.
=
A Nice Ode
Shit-I'm-Creepy Vermin-Food,
Please pal, I ain't in the mood.
Ads again?! Leave or find, nut,
My foot in yer ninny butt!
ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY, January 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Let's look at some of the top-grossing cinematic features in the USA: =
'Titanic': The film gets cute as Rose lets go of one Romeo at a sunk ship...
'Forrest Gump': So, a nice stooge, a *fool*, is the luckiest man in the state?!
'Home Alone': Nice tot gets (then uses) gifts - mutilates a pair of crooks!
'The Lion King': Animators use computer tool-sets; see 'Cat Fights a Foe'.
'E.T.': Focus on a cute alien's task to go "Phone Home". I stress it - great film!
SPECIAL CATEGORY, January 2001:
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Several treatments of a pair of acrostic poems,
one by Carroll to a friend and one by Poe's ill wife to her husband.
ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, February 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Charles Dickens's 'Oliver Twist' =
The classic writer's kids' novel!
RUDE CATEGORY, February 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
'Snow White's Nasty Adventures', The X-Rated Video =
Sexy tart does in-and-out with the seven dwarves!
LONG SPAM CATEGORY, February 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
T E S T I M O N I A L S *******
PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY, February 2001:
eq.1st - Meyran Kraus with: [An 18th century composer]
Giovanni Pergolesi =
I love opera singing!
ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY, February 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Did you know only these three motion pictures won the five most valuable and prestigious Academy Awards? =
'It Happened One Night': Mousy runaway heiress (diva Claudette Colbert) soaks a wonderful movie's witty mood.
'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest': Wild guy tries to start a mutiny in a madhouse. Movie is hard and bawdy, people!
'The Silence of the Lambs': A murderous, devouring Lecter (Hopkins) dupes a woody SWAT team on a way to divinity.
SPECIAL CATEGORY, February 2001:
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
George
Meredith: Love in the Valley
RUDE CATEGORY, March 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
A Ten-Inch Dick =
Nice and thick!
SPECIAL CATEGORY, April 2001:
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Spamagram: The Raven
SPAM CATEGORY, May 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
A PERSONAL NOTE FROM THE ORIGINATOR OF THIS PROGRAM:
By the time you have read the enclosed program, you may have concluded that an amateur could not have created such a legal program that works.
Let me tell you a little about myself. I had a profitable business for 10 years. Then in 1979 my business began falling off. I was doing the same things that were previously successful for me, but it wasn't working. Finally, I figured it out. It wasn't me, it was the economy. Inflation and recession had replaced the stable economy that had been with us since 1945.
I don't have to tell you what happened to the unemployment rates...because many of you know from first hand experience. There were more failures and bankruptcies than ever before.
The middle class was vanishing. Those who knew what they were doing invested wisely and moved up. Those who did not, including those who never had anything to save or invest, were moving down into the ranks of the poor. As the saying goes, "THE RICH GET RICHER AND THE POOR GET POORER." The traditional methods of making money will never allow you to "move up" or "get rich", inflation will see to that.
=
AN ENRAGED RESPONSE TO THIS UNFORGIVABLE WEB OFFER:
Hi, unworthy beggar. By the time you read this my cugine may already be on his way to your apartment to gut you and then dance on the mutilated corpse.
Let me mention my name, fucker. I'm Don Tito "The Gravedigger" Vampari. I'm Italian and have a very loving, real *devoted* family. We settled here in the United States to sell, uh, wool-clips and nose-powder.
Now, only 'cause Tito takes care of business every day doesn't mean Tito can't surf the net a little bit at night, right? Wrong. See, some fucking idiot gets in Tito's way when he surfs with his goomah and makes him unhappy - and datsa you.
Well, I'll be honest- we're no strangers to spam. Our dear friend and peer, Ton "The Velvet Glove" Reelilocco, the lord have mercy on his soul, explored the web-shakedowns occupation for a while. He forgot, however, that Vin "The Milkman" Eatcheerios had his hands on the whole web shit for ages. Now Ton has a pair of cement shoes and greets the fish from the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean.
Wanna be a wise guy? Fuck off or I'll turn your pisello into my Rottweiler's lunch. COPPISH?!
Wrathful,
Don Vampari
SPECIAL CATEGORY, May 2001:
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Dora
Sigerson: Ireland
ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, June 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The Royal Shakespeare Company =
One may appear there as Shylock.
SPAM CATEGORY, July 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Take a minute to fill out the simple form below and receive a
quote comparing the best values from among hundreds of the nation's
top insurance companies!
First Name:
Last Name:
Address:
City:
State:
Zip:
Phone:
Best Time To Call:
Email:
Gender:
-Male
-Female
Date of Birth:
Type of Insurance:
Insurance Amount:
Do You Currently Own An Annuity?
-Yes
-No
Would You Be Interested in Annuity Information?
-Yes
-No
Height:
Weight:
Tobacco Use:
-Never smoked or used nicotine
-Quit less than 1 yr ago
-Quit 1-3 yrs ago
-Quit 3-5 yrs ago
-Quit over 5 yrs ago
-Currently smoke cigarettes
-Other nicotine use-cigars/pipe/chew/patch
Health Status:
-Excellent: trim and athletic, no medications
-Good: no infirmities and no medications
-Fair: slightly overweight or taking medication
-Poor: have/had a serious health condition
Health conditions?
-Yes
-No
Prescription medications?
-Yes
-No
Do you engage in any hazardous activities? (i.e.scuba, skydiving,
private pilot, etc.)
-Yes
-No
Did your parents or siblings have heart disease or cancer prior
to age 60?
-Yes
-No
=
Quoted from the NRA Application Questionnaire:
Name:
Tattoos:
Farm/Oilfield:
Age:
-Under 15
-Over 63
Education:
-High School
-Other?!?!
Monthly Gun-Budget:
-Over a hundred G's
-Over nine hundred G's
-Unlimited
Are You a Man?
-Yes
-Shit, yes
-No, but I'm becomin' one next week
Are You a Republican?
-Yes
-Sure
-Obviously
Complete this sentence: "Immigrants are..."
-Quite sweet
-A menace to our country
-Target practice
Complete this sentence: "A paranoid is..."
-Insane
-An imaginative man
-Always prepared
Most Prized Possession:
-A boycotted dynamite load
-10 D.U.I. reports
-A dagger collection
-A '53 Dodge
A Movie/TV Icon:
-Rocky I
-Rocky II
-Rocky IV
-The Three Stooges
Which of these phrases is 'Politically Incorrect'?
-Nosy Chinks
-Spotty Niggers
-Pansy-Ass Faggots
-Voodoo Indians
-Lovely Nazis
-Gee, ain't nuttin' here politely incorrected
You can intermit a theft by...
-Alertin' a squad car
-Needlin' each of the bastard's eyes
-Forcin' the demon to eat his own gonads
It's wrong to hunt...
-If the animal is unique
-If I run out of ammunition
-This isn't a realistic situation.
SPECIAL CATEGORY, July 2001:
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Peace
by Henry Vaughan, anagrammed into paraphrases of three existing poems also related to roses.
ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY, August 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
William Butler Yeats =
Sit, write me a lullaby.
GENERAL CATEGORY, September 2001:
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Nude Modelling =
Indulge old men.
SPECIAL CATEGORY, September 2001:
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
[A selection of Caravaggio-related anagrams.]
Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio =
I color image in grave, magical shade.
O, each allegoric image is raving mad.
Mad vision? Ah, image allegoric grace.
Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio's 'Judith and Holofernes' =
Oh, a vein's ejaculating, flooding her, as her old maid grimaces.
Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio's 'David and Goliath' =
'A Clad Child Removing a Giant Rival's Head' is a good image.
Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio's 'The Entombment of Christ' =
Ah, face highest, tragic moment - 'Immortal Savior Being Enclosed'.
Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio's 'The Conversion of Saint Paul' =
One eager horse clumps along at a magical vision of a divine Christ.
Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio's 'The Crucifixion of Saint Peter' =
Ah, massive piece of a grim execution. Again, terrific colors and light!
SPECIAL CATEGORY, October 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Virginia
Woolf's suicide note to her husband Leonard
TOPICAL CATEGORY, November 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Search for Osama Bin Laden Proves Difficult =
A darn problem - US forces fail to find his cave!
OTHER NAMES CATEGORY, November 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Seven Eleven Incorporated =
Open it and never ever close!
SPECIAL CATEGORY, November 2001:
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Everlast:
What It's Like
SPAM CATEGORY, December 2001:
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The Mother of a 15 year old boy was cleaning and putting laundry
away when she came across a large brown paper bag that was suspiciously
buried beneath some clothes and a skateboard in the back of her
15-year-old son's closet. Nothing could have prepared her for
the shock she got when she opened the bag and found it was full
of cash; five dollar bills, twenties, fifties and hundreds - all
neatly rubber-banded in labeled piles.
"My first thought was that he had robbed a bank," says the 41-year-old woman, "There was over $71,000 dollars in that bag\'85.. that's more than my husband earns in a year." The woman immediately called her husband at the car dealership where he worked to tell him what she'd discovered. He came home right away and they drove together to the boy's school and picked him up. Little did they suspect that where the money came from was more shocking than actually finding it in the closet.
As it turns out, the boy had been sending out via E-mail on the Internet a type of 'chain-letter' to E-mail addresses that he got off of the Internet. Everyday after school for the past 2 months, he had been doing this right on his computer in his bedroom.
=
Two days later the parents recovered another bag labelled "Hot Chicks Get Hosed By Old Guys", with cheap photos and bootleg tapes. "Ah, Bobby's an adult!" his mother grinned, while his father reacted, "That's true, he's mature now. We all have fantasies, like, oh, deep anal fun with Thatcher."
The caring parents still defended him when he hacked into the phone company's mainframe and then into four city banks. "Well, calling him 'charlatan' or 'corruptive' is a bit harsh," the boy's mother remarked, "Nobody's perfect. He's no Unabomber... yet." "Oh, he's obviously grown up," his dad deduced, "Learning a vocation is a significant thing. He promised us he'd get off his butt and 'make money' and he sure did, down in his basement. Those notes were perfect, utterly identical to five and twenty dollar bills! What a craftsman."
After the boy ran an illegal pyramid scheme, a sour mob stormed the house. "Oh, what a lovely boy!" the mother was heard yelling in the riot as the angry mob smashed the front door, "Hundreds of fans line up to see him! What a great lad!!!" "Hey, at least he has a good taste," added the boy's dad as they were about to be lynched, "After all, those chicks *were* hot!"
SPECIAL CATEGORY, December 2001:
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
John
Keats: Ode on Melancholy
| Home | | The Anagrammy Awards | Enter the Forum | Facebook | The Team |  |
| Information | | Awards Rules | Forum FAQ | Anagrams FAQ | History | Articles | |
| Resources | | Anagram Artist Software | Generators | On-line | Books | Websites | |
| Archive | | Winners | Nominations | Hall of Fame | Anagrammasia | Literary | |
| Competition | | Vote | Current Nominations | Leader Board | Latest Results | Old Results | Rankings | |
| Miscellaneous | | Tribute Page | Records | Sitemap | Search | Anagram Checker | Email Us | Donate | |
| Anagrammy Awards | © 1998-2012 Last updated 16th May, 2008 |