Tony Crafter

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Original text in yellow, anagram in pink.

GEORGIA ON MY MIND
by
Ray Charles

Georgia, Georgia, the whole day through
Just an old sweet song
Keeps Georgia on my mind

Talkin' 'bout Georgia
I'm in Georgia
A song of you
Comes as sweet and clear as moonlight through the pines

Other arms reach out to me
Other eyes smile tenderly
Still in peaceful dreams I see
The road leads back to you

Georgia, sweet Georgia, no peace I find
Just an old sweet song
Keeps Georgia on my mind

Other arms reach out to me
Other eyes smile tenderly
Still in peaceful dreams I see
The road leads back
It always leads back to you

Georgia, Georgia, no peace I find
Just an old, sweet song
Keeps Georgia on my mind

GEORGIE ON MY SIDE - (An ace creep to a mate).
A. Blair

Georgie, Georgie, cool, calm and kind,
Just the sound of bombs
Keeps Georgie on my mind.

Oh, peace-pal, Georgie,
Yo! war-mate Georgie,
I aim to please,
That goes for me, and Cherie so agrees.

Other arms, artillery,
Shell and gun and infantry,
Can't kill as good as yours I see,
That's why I team with you.

George, gee, Georgie; esteemed and wise
Just an old pals' act
Keeps me on George's side.

Other arms, artillery,
Shell and gun and infantry,
Can't kill as good as yours I see,
That's why I team with you.
There's such a lot I owe to you.

Georgie, Georgie, cool, calm and kind
Just the sound of bombs
Keeps Georgie on my mind.

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AN IRISH AIRMAN FORESEES HIS DEATH
by
W. B. Yeats

I know that I shall meet my fate
Somewhere among the clouds above;
Those that I fight I do not hate
Those that I guard I do not love;
My country is Kiltartan Cross,
My countrymen Kiltartans poor,
No likely end could bring them loss
Or leave them happier than before.
Nor law, nor duty bade me fight,
Nor public man, nor cheering crowds,
A lonely impulse of delight
Drove to this tumult in the clouds;
I balanced all, brought all to mind,
The years to come seemed waste of breath,
A waste of breath the years behind
In balance with this life, this death.

MY HOSTILITY AT A BASRA OUTPOST
(Private Thoughts of a young English Soldier)

I know that I shall meet my foe
Somewhere out in the Basra sand;
Those that I'll fight I do not know
Those that I guard don't understand;
My country is my England dear
My countrymen a snobbish race,
No likely end will bring them cheer
Or make this Earth a better place.
No holy visions made me care
Enough to be prepared to die,
But Mr Bush and Mr Blair
Declared this war, so here am I.
I've balanced off each man we've lost
In battle, with each toll of life;
The blood, the hell, the final cost,
Is any outcome worth this strife?

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MEMPHIS TENNESSEE
by
Chuck Berry

Long distance information, give me Memphis Tennessee
Help me find the party trying to get in touch with me
She could not leave her number, but I know who placed the call
'Cause my uncle took the message and he wrote it on the wall

Help me, information, get in touch with my Marie
She's the only one who'd phone me here from Memphis Tennessee
Her home is on the south side, high up on a ridge
Just a half a mile from the Mississippi Bridge

Help me, information, more than that I cannot add
Only that I miss her and all the fun we had
But we were pulled apart because her mom did not agree
And tore apart our happy home in Memphis Tennessee

Last time I saw Marie she's waving me good-bye
With hurry home drops on her cheek that trickled from her eye
Marie is only six years old, information please
Try to put me through to her in Memphis Tennessee

GET HERE!

Help me Express Plumbers, I've one big emergency,
There's a leak in my home water tank, that's drippin' here on me,
The ceiling's damp and I see water streamin' down the wall,
As I sit here in a puddle by the home-phone in the hall.

Help me I'm in trouble, 'cos the drip's become a flow,
I've told you my dilemma, man, what more d'you need to know?
Pardon me, what's that you say? 'Choose options - one of three,
Then confirm the number with a press of the hash key'?

Help me Mr. Plumber for the drip's become a gush,
Now the ceiling's saggin' and is changin' into mush,
You say my call's important; seems I'm fourteenth in the line,
Thirteen more to go (then press the hash just one more time).

Damn, the ceiling's disappeared, there's nothin' left of it!
Furthermore you're playin' Handel's Water Music shit!
I'm swimmin' like a merman through the house and out the home,
Hey, it's academic now, forget I ever phoned.

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AS TIME GOES BY
Music and lyrics by
Herman Hupfeld

You must remember this
A kiss is just a kiss, a sigh is just a sigh.
The fundamental things apply
As time goes by.

And when two lovers woo
They still say, "I love you."
On that you can rely
No matter what the future brings
As time goes by.

Moonlight and love songs
Never out of date.
Hearts full of passion
Jealousy and hate.
Woman needs man
And man must have his mate
That no one can deny.

It's still the same old story
A fight for love and glory
A case of do or die.
The world will always welcome lovers
As time goes by.

Oh yes, the world will always welcome lovers
As time goes by.

Summary of: 'CASABLANCA'

Sad 'Bogie' plays Rick Blaine,
Lost, joyless, full of pain; then Ilsa Lund returns.
Ingrid Bergman plays the woman
For whom he yearns.

They'd been soul-mates years ago,
And he still loves her, though
She's wed another guy,
The film is set in World War Two,
A time gone by.

Sam sings a love song
On emotivity,
Blaine just loves Sam's song,
So in that moment he
Wants Madame Lund to stay,
The catch? She's got a guy,
O my, O my, O my.

That fellow needs a visa
To leave with wifey 'Lisa',
(Well, 'Ilsa' doesn't rhyme!)
They ask Blaine, "Would you give us letters?"
To aid the crime.

So, poor sod just waves her off too sadly,
It made us cry.

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LUCY IN THE SKY WITH DIAMONDS
by
The Beatles

Picture yourself in a boat on a river,
With tangerine trees and marmalade skies
Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly,
A girl with kaleidoscope eyes.

Cellophane flowers of yellow and green,
Towering over your head.
Look for the girl with the sun in her eyes,
And she's gone.

{REFRAIN}
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
Ah... Ah...

Follow her down to a bridge by a fountain
Where rocking horse people eat marshmallow pies,
Everyone smiles as you drift past the flowers,
That grow so incredibly high.
Newspaper taxis appear on the shore,
Waiting to take you away.
Climb in the back with your head in the clouds,
And you're gone.

{REFRAIN}
Lucy in the sky with diamonds ...
Ah ... Ah ...

Picture yourself on a train in a station,
With plasticine porters with looking glass ties,
Suddenly someone is there at the turnstile,
The girl with kaleidoscope eyes.

{REFRAIN}
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
Ah... Ah...

BROKEN GLASSES

Picture yourself there outside the Dakota,
With Yoko, in west-side Manhattan, N.Y,
Suddenly someone appears from the shadows,
The man with the far-away eyes.

In this weird moment, the world stands quite still,
Everything's drifting away,
I look at the man who's extending his hand ...
With a gun.

{REFRAIN}
Is this really how I will die?
Is this really how I will die?
Is this really how I will die?

Follows behind you, cries out, "Mr Lennon!"
You look back, his gun kicks, you feel burning pain,
Somebody screams as you drop to the sidewalk;
You pray he won't shoot you again.
Cop-car with siren arrives on the scene,
Waiting to take you away,
Lie in the back while your life drips away,
Then you're gone...

{REFRAIN}
Is this truly how I shall die? ...

Picture yourself looking down on a sidewalk,
At shattered, red spectacles lying close by,
Yoko prays, clasping your head to her breast while
The man reads The Catcher In The Rye.

+ + +

ON DECEMBER EIGHTH, NINETEEN EIGHTY, SOLITARY PSYCHOPATH MARK DAVID CHAPMAN SNUFFED OUT 'MR. LENNON'.

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The fool hath said in his heart, "There is no God." (The Psalms)

Ah, The Good Lord is not harsh; He pities the faithless man.

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DEATH IS NOTHING AT ALL
by Henry Scott Holland,
Canon of St Paul's Cathedral

Death is nothing at all.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
I am I and you are you.
Whatever we were to each other,
that we still are.

Call me by my old familiar name.
Speak to me in the easy way
which you always used.
Put no difference in your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed
At the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect,
without the trace of a shadow on it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolutely unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?

I am waiting for you, for an interval,
Somewhere very near,
Just around the corner.

All is well.

POETS OF THE PLOT
(A Witty Output of Fatal Utterances!)

Here lies the body of Katy Charlotte,
Born a virgin, died a harlot;
She was aye a virgin at seventeen,
A remarkable feat in Aberdeen.

Here lies my wife,
Let her lie!
Now she's at peace
And so am I.

Solomon Isaac lies under this ground,
Don't rattle your money when you walk around.

Who lies here?
Me, Matty Macuitty
Ah, Matty, is that you?
Ay, man, but a'm dead noo.

That plot is the nicest I've seen all my life,
For it nurtures the flowers and covers my wife.

(To A Wife)
As I am now, so you will be
Madam, get ready to follow me.

(To A Husband)
To follow you I am not content
How would I know which way you went?

(To A Dentist):
Stranger, approach yon plot with gravity!
Jonah MacKue's filling his last cavity.

I would rather be here
Than in Texas.

Here lies my wife,
Here lies she;
Hallelujah!
Hallelujee!

Here lies Tony Crafter.
Who?

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MY GENERATION
The Who

People try to put us d-down
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
Just because we get around
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
Things they do look awful c-c-cold
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I hope I die before I get old
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)

This is my generation
This is my generation, baby

Why don't you all f-fade away
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
And don't try to dig what we all s-s-say
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm not trying to cause a big s-s-sensation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm just talkin' 'bout my g-g-g-generation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)

This is my generation
This is my generation, baby

Why don't you all f-fade away
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
And don't try to d-dig what we all s-s-say
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm not trying to cause a b-big s-s-sensation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm just talkin' 'bout my g-g-generation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)

This is my generation
This is my generation, baby

People try to put us d-down
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
Just because we g-g-get around
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
Things they do look awful c-c-cold
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
Yeah, I hope I die before I get old
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)

This is my generation
This is my generation, baby

MY ... WHAT? WHY?
by ... Who?
(alias Jerry Atric)

My family want to poison me
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Just 'cos I am eighty-three
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Things they do are awful cruel
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Like puttin' strychnine in my gruel
(Talking 'bout degeneration)

Yo! It's denigration
Of my limitations, baby.

Why don't you just s-s-s-stop that, please
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
M-m-moanin' about my rest-home fees,
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
I'm not tryin' to be a b-burden to yah,
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
It's not my fault I'm g-goin' peculiar
(Talking 'bout degeneration)

Yo! It's denigration
Of my limitations baby.

Why won't you all s-s-s-stay away
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Don't want you s-spongers anyway
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
You took my glasses, took m-my teeth
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Now I can't s-see and I can't eat
(Talking 'bout degeneration)

Yo! It's denigrating
My limitations, baby.

My family want to poison me
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Just 'cos I am eighty-three
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Things they do are awful cruel
(Talking 'bout degeneration)
Like puttin' strychnine in my gruel
(Talking 'bout degeneration)

This is my baby onions, baby,
Yo, yo my ...um ... baby? ...onions?
Who?

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Updated: May 10, 2016


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