Anagrammy Placegetters for November 2017

All the highly-placed anagrams from the November 2017 Anagrammy Awards.

[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]

THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

1st - Dean Mayer with:
Irish singer Sinead O'Connor =
No hair in recording session

2nd - Adie Pena with:
Famous sculptor Auguste Rodin's "The Thinker" =
So keep that muscular nude sitting for hours.

3rd - David Bourke with:
The late American pop singer David Cassidy =
A dynamic Seventies soap child...a Partridge.

THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

1st - Ellie with:
Meghan and Prince =
Champagne dinner!

2nd - Adie Pena with:
The Hollywood film producer Harvey Weinstein =
Lofty lecher had power in whole movie industry.

3rd - John Ramos with:
Moore for Senate =
A Romeo for teens.

THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Jon Gearhart with:
The Central Bank of Nigeria =
Bring on a fake chain letter.

2nd - Ellie with:
Windsor Castle, Berks, England =
Kings and well-bred ancestors.

3rd - Tony Crafter with:
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community =
Mad mix seen by certain godly beings as unnatural.

THE LONG CATEGORY

1st - Tony Crafter with:
Roy, a retired widower, met Trudy at a singles club meeting and, although she was a good deal younger than him, they discovered they enjoyed each other's company.

After several weeks meeting for coffee, Roy asked her out for dinner and, much to his delight, she said 'yes'. They had a lovely evening and dined at the most romantic restaurant in town.

Despite his age, they ended up at his place for drinks. Things continued along a natural course and, the age gap being no inhibitor, Trudy soon joined Roy for a most pleasurable romp in his bedroom.

As they lay basking in the glow of the magic moments they had shared, each was lost for a time in their own thoughts...

Roy was thinking: 'If I'd known she was still a virgin, I'd have been gentler.'

Trudy was thinking: 'If I'd known he could still do it, I'd have taken my tights off!'

=

On her fiftieth wedding anniversary, Kate found the flimsy black negligee she had worn on her honeymoon night and tried it on. She then went jiggling off to her husband, Vincent, and asked, "Hey, Vince, do you remember this?"

He looked up from his newspaper and said; "Hell, I certainly do, Kate! You wore that very same negligee on the first night of our marriage."

Kate grinned , "That's right; and do you also recall just what words you said to me that night?"

He smirked and replied, "Yes, I recall them. I said: Oh baby, I am gonna suck the life right out of those breasts and screw your brains out."

She giggled and retorted, "Why, that's precisely what you said, Vince! And now it's fifty years later, and I'm in that same negligee, so - what have you got to say to me tonight?"

Vincent looked her up and down and said, "Mission accomplished."

2nd - Adie Pena with:
BANG BANG (MY BABY SHOT ME DOWN)

I was five and he was six
We rode on horses made of sticks
He wore black and I wore white
He would always win the fight

REFRAIN
Bang bang, he shot me down
Bang bang, I hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, my baby shot me down.

Seasons came and changed the time
When I grew up, I called him mine
He would always laugh and say
Remember when we used to play?

REPEAT REFRAIN

Music played, and people sang
Just for me, the church bells rang.

Now he's gone, I don't know why
And 'til this day, sometimes I cry
He didn't even say goodbye
He didn't take the time to lie.

REPEAT REFRAIN

=

IN MEMORIAM

Optimum bloodshed; minimum kindness. How death had just withheld simple hopes.

We hear Bang Bang in a small Sutherland Springs church. We see twenty-six dead (that includes an unborn baby).

We hear Bang Bang at Sandy Hook Elementary School, Newtown. We see twenty-seven dead.

We hear Bang Bang in Virginia Tech, Blacksburg. We see thirty-two dead.

We hear Bang Bang in Pulse, a gay Orlando club. We see forty-nine dead.

We hear Bang Bang from the thirty-second floor of Mandalay Bay. We see fifty-eight dead.

God! How pitiful. How sickening.

We see doomsday with the damp hogwash of mighty NRA.

Amen.
3rd - Ellie with:
THE GOGHS

After much careful and painstaking research, it has finally been discovered that renowned Dutch artist Vincent Van Gogh actually had many relatives, previously unknown to the general public. Among them were the following:

His obnoxious and insensitive brother, Please Gogh
His dizzy aunt, on his mother's side, Verti Gogh
The brother who ate prunes, Gotta Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store, Stop 'n' Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia, U. Gogh
The brother who bleached his clothes extra white, Hue Gogh
The cousin from Illinois, Chica Gogh
A little bouncy nephew, Poe Gogh
His uncle, a magician, Wherediddy Gogh
~
His nephew, the clearly twisted, repressive shrink, E. Gogh
The thrifty Mexican cousin, Amee Gogh
The Mexican cousin's American half-brother, Grin Gogh
The storekeeper nephew who drove a stagecoach, Wellsfar Gogh
The constipated uncle, the haberdasher, Cant Gogh (truly!)
The voluptuous ballroom dancing aunt, Tan Gogh
The storyteller and bird lover uncle, Flamin Gogh
The hotheaded fruit loving cousin, Man Gogh
His posh Aunt from Brazil who was into positive thinking, Wayto Gogh
The overdressed sister who loved barefoot disco, but in a hat (huh?), Go Gogh
His Italian uncle, Day Gogh
The niece who breezed the country in a van, Winnie Bay Gogh.
---------------------------------------------------------

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

1st - Tony Crafter with:
SYMPATHY
A Poem by
Bishop Reginald Heber

A knight and a lady once met in a grove
While each was in quest of a fugitive love;
A river ran mournfully murmuring by,
And they wept in its waters for sympathy.

"Oh, never was knight such a sorrow that bore!"
"Oh, never was maid so deserted before!"
"From life and its woes let us instantly fly,
And jump in together for company!"

They searched for an eddy that suited the deed,
But here was a bramble and there was a weed;
"How tiresome it is!" said the fair, with a sigh;
So they sat down to rest them in company.

They gazed at each other, the maid and the knight;
How fair was her form, and how goodly his height!
"One mournful embrace," sobbed the youth, "ere we die!
So kissing and crying kept company.

"Oh, had I but loved such an angel as you!"
"Oh, had but my swain been a quarter as true!"
"To miss such perfection how blinded was I!"
Sure now they were excellent company!

At length spoke the lass, 'twixt a smile and a tear,
"The weather is cold for a watery bier;
When summer returns we may easily die,
Till then let us sorrow in company."

=

SYMPATHY?
By
Ed Ache

If there's a head torture that's worse than a snore,
I'd love to know just what exactly that is,
While I lie awake to my wife's nasal roar,
She slumbers contented in comatose bliss.

I plead with her, "Anne, show some sympathy please,
I have to get up for my shift in the morn,
Yet, dear, you continue to snore and to wheeze
And I'm still awake when the birds sing at dawn!"

She vexedly scoffs, "Ed, quit the dumb cheeping,
When you get grumpy, it is such a bore,
It isn't my fault you have trouble sleeping,
And despite what you say, no way do I snore!"

My reader, I swear this is madly untrue,
That woman, she's making me haggard and ill,
For when she gets going, the row from her tubes
Is worse than the din of a pneumatic drill!

I have tried everything I can to curb her,
From hugs to a pinch to a full body shake,
But nothing I try can darn well perturb her,
Short of a bomb and maybe an earthquake.

Divorcing's the answer for weary me,
I can't bear my headachy bed any more;
For there are two people I wedded, we see:
My dear, calm wife and that mad shrew who snores!

2nd - Adie Pena with:
The White House
by Claude McKay

Your door is shut against my tightened face,
And I am sharp as steel with discontent;
But I possess the courage and the grace
To bear my anger proudly and unbent.
The pavement slabs burn loose beneath my feet,
And passion rends my vitals as I pass,
A chafing savage, down the decent street;
Where boldly shines your shuttered door of glass.
Oh, I must search for wisdom every hour,
Deep in my wrathful bosom sore and raw,
And find in it the superhuman power
To hold me to the letter of your law!
Oh, I must keep my heart inviolate
Against the potent poison of your hate.
=
The White House
by The Donald

Perhaps I'll ruin you -- the country Somalia,
Rotten suspects that massacre and slay.
Emigre upheavals, a weakened Syria,
Shipped out now, refused since yesterday.
Immigrants stopped, too, from yonder Yemen,
Detestable people who bomb and behead.
Entering visitors from Libya, then
Not humane, the hostages must be dead!
Throw in the list of vagabonds from Chad,
The thugs they put away can't ever win.
Rogues cut off from Iran, youth so bad;
United, our States won't let those convicts in.
Muslims aside, now here's North Korea
Pyongyang's hateful leader has diarrhoea!

3rd - Ellie with:
RULES FOR DOG OWNERS (suggested by their own loyal dogs)

I will not bathe my dog after he has gone to all the trouble of bathing himself in a convenient mud puddle

I will not push my dog away when he wants a hug after playing in the aforementioned mud puddle.

I will not complain 'My arm's tired' after only throwing the ball a mere twenty times.

I will not confuse my dog by throwing rock-hard snowballs for him to fetch.

I will not ask my dog to play fetch with a boomerang ... too cruel.

I will not drag my dog away from interesting sniffing spots.

I will drop whatever I am doing and then take my dog out as soon as he asks me to.

I will not tell my dog to hurry up already when he's looking for just the right spot to take care of business.

I will not stare when my dog is doing his business.

I will not presume to feed the cat before I feed my dog.

I will get rid of that pesky old cat, Sooty.

I will not bring home any more cats.

I will never eat until my dog has tasted what I have and approved it's OK for me too.

I will share everything I eat with my dog.

I will set up the kiddie pool every day it is hot - even in December.

I will not leave my dog at home any time I like to go for a drive in the car.

I will allow my dog on the couch.

I will not make my dog pose for pictures with some fat shifty looking stranger who's wearing a bright red suit

I will protect my dog from that obnoxious little human thing at all times.
~
I will not have another of those mighty obnoxious little human things.

I will not hide my dog's pet ball in a place where I know he couldn't possibly retrieve it from, then ask him to go get it.

I will not take shredded, soggy, yummy tennis balls away from my dog.

I will not sneak around the yard wearing funny clothes to test whether my dog is a good watchdog.

I will stop referring to my dog's necklace as their 'collar.'

I will not cut my dog's nails.

I will not abandon my dog for a trivial human reason like 'going in town to work'.

I will not wake my dog when I come home.

I will not come home from work and feel the sofa, to see if the throw still feels warm from where my dog was sleeping there 'illegally'.

A hint of bad weather is never a reason for not walking my dog.

I will open the door as soon as my dog sits by it. Immediately.

I will not laugh at my dog for being unhappy, if confused over not being able to find that lump of ice that he buried earlier.

I will never run out of doggy treats.

I will always aim to somehow carry fifty-plus doggy treats.

I won't attempt to make my dog wear the soppy old pet outfit that he hates... the stupid festive antlers, the vivid red hat.

I will not tie ribbons or fit idiotic bows all over my pet puppy dog.

I will not use the fiendish home decorations like tinsel, which might, just might be dangerous to my dog.

And I will try much harder to understand my dog's language.

[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]

Home	\| The Anagrammy Awards \| Enter the Forum \| Facebook \| The Team
Information	\| Awards Rules \| Forum FAQ \| Anagrams FAQ \| History \| Articles
Resources	\| Anagram Artist Software \| Generators \| On-line \| Books \| Websites
Archive	\| Winners \| Nominations \| Hall of Fame \| Anagrammasia \| Literary
Competition	\| Vote \| Current Nominations \| Leader Board \| Latest Results \| Old Results \| Rankings
Miscellaneous	\| Tribute Page \| Records \| Sitemap \| Search \| Anagram Checker \| Email Us \| Donate
Anagrammy Awards	© 1998-2024 Last updated 27th July, 2018

Anagrammy Placegetters for November 2017

THE GENERAL CATEGORY

THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

THE PEOPLES NAMES CATEGORY

THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY

THE ANAGRAMMY CHALLENGE CATEGORY

THE LONG CATEGORY

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

THE RUDE CATEGORY