Anagrammy Placegetters for January 2004

All the highly-placed anagrams from the January 2004 Anagrammy Awards.

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THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Peter Jackson, the director of the LOTR series =
Three hits recreate Tolkien's Frodo projects.

2nd - Richard Grantham with:
A minuet =
I'm a tune.

3rd - Hans-Peter Reich with:
Animated Motion Pictures =
Put cartoon items in media.

THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Images from the NASA Spirit rover =
Impart great visions of Mars here.

2nd - Richard Grantham with:
Resolutions =
Onerous list.

3rd - Jesse Frankovich with:
President Bush's State of the Union Address =
Phrases used had tidbits of utter nonsense.

THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Jaybur with:
Nurse Florence Nightingale, Lady with the Lamp =
Helping men who fell: it's rather an angelic duty.

2nd - View with:
Saddam Hussein =
Ass in a mud shed.

3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
R. 'Dick' Cheney, Vice President of America =
I scheme, trick and deceive for any price.

THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY

1st - Adrian Hickford with:
There are 10 kinds of people: those who understand binary and those who don't. =
Ho ho! The sharp-eyed nerd! How wonderful not to be trained to speak in 1's and 0's.

2nd - David Bourke with:
The National Association of Dog Obedience Instructors, Incorporated =
A resource to condition snarling Fido to be nice to those paranoid cats.

3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
"Mona Lisa Smile", the Columbia Pictures production of a Mike Newell film, starring Julia Roberts ('Katherine Watson').=
Correct me if I'm wrong, but darn it, Julia's smile in this feature almost looks like it carries one whole, plump banana!

THE LONG CATEGORY

1st - Adrian Hickford with: [A poem by George Crabbe (1754–1832)]
The Marriage

The ring, so worn as you behold,
So thin, so pale, is yet of gold:
The passion such it was to prove--
Worn with life's care, love yet was love.

=

Suppose it's Over

Though it was brilliant, yet it's tarnished now,
The wooing's gone, also the former vow.
A horoscope says "Away he'll flee."
D. I. V. O. R. C. E.

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Top Ten Ways I, Howard Dean, Can Turn Things Around

10. "Switch to decaf"
9. "Unveil new slogan: 'Vote for Dean and get one dollar off your next purchase at Blimpie'"
8. "Marry Rachel on final episode of 'Friends'"
7. "Don't change a thing -- it's going great"
6. "Show a little more skin"
5. "Go on 'American Idol' and give 'em a taste of these pipes"
4. "Start working out and speaking with Austrian accent"
3. "I can't give specifics yet, but it involves Ted Danson"
2. "Fire the staffer who suggested we do this lousy Top Ten list instead of actually campaigning"
1. "Oh, I don't know -- maybe fewer crazy, redfaced rants"

(The list is borrowed from the CBS Late Show with David Letterman)

=

Top Ten Tactics of Snagging Away G.W.'s Presidency

10. Lure him out of the Oval Office with a picnic basket
9. Pay off his tutor and get G.W. to enunciate 'poor' with a silent 'r'
8. Add Alec Baldwin to the White House staff
7. Put a pretzel in his snack kit
6. Tell him a nationwide campaign includes the fifty-first state of Rwanda
5. Ban every voter whose lingo contains 'Howdy'
4. Add an annexe to Rules of Governmental Positions, reasserting a fifth-grade education as mandatory
3. Add "no drunk drivers" to above rules
2. End all wars and dry most oil wells

And the No. One Tactic is:

1. Inform George that words might get even bigger in second-term speeches!

3rd - David A. Green with:
The Operation by Danielle Willis

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

1st - Adrian Hickford with:
Tarzan's Cheetah's Life As A Retired Movie Star

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
A Jonathan Swift poem, which can be presented as a riddle when its title is obscured, anagrammed (with a twist) into another riddle poem whose subject is hidden.

3rd - Richard Grantham with:
A simultaneous anagram and approximate translation of J'allais par des chemins perfides by Paul Verlaine.

THE AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE CATEGORY

This month's Challenge was to create anagrams of New Year's Resolutions or a slight variation of that phrase.

1st - Richard Grantham with:
New Year's Resolution =
Only we aren't serious!

2nd - Alan Yoshioka with:
New Year's Resolutions ~
are surely not wise, son.

3rd - Larry Brash with:
New Year's Resolutions ~
to lessen your swearin'.